Laughter.......it truly IS the best medicine!

Marty was putting together some video that we had taken several years ago of the grandkids and also some of the last vacation we took before his lung surgery.   There was so much laughter in them.   He and I.....laughing and having a good time.  

Somewhere in the last several years I seem to have lost that.  What has happened to me?   I've been told that I am way too serious anymore.   I don't try to be.  It's not my intention to be.    I have plenty to be happy about and thankful for.  Maybe it's all the things I have to think about as a caregiver.   I have a lot on my plate.   Why can't I just laugh???????

Perhaps it's because when you laugh you have to let go and relax.   That's hard to do sometimes when you have so many things to think about.  Although, I'm actually less busy than I was when the kids were in school and we were running here, there and everywhere with them.  Rushing home to be sure everyone was fed and where they needed to be.  I am home almost every evening.     

Have I lost the ability to laugh and enjoy life?   No......I don't think so.   I mean, I'm not a sad person. I think maybe I've just forgotten how.   I think this will be my new goal.   Be happy.....Be joyful......Put some laughter back in our lives.  

When we laugh we feel better......and who doesn't want to feel better???   

PEACE.............

Peace......Do we really know what that is?   Truly???  As a caregiver you go through so much turmoil taking care of the one you love.  It can be hard to feel that peace.   God has really been dealing with me in that area.   The pressure of making sure everything is done and getting it "just right" is sometimes more than you can bear.   

Caregiver......what is the definition???  "... a person who gives help and protection to someone (such as a child, an old person, or someone who is sick)"   I never really thought about the responsibilities of a caregiver.   Help and protection.   It's true though.   I sit at work and think and worry (I know, I know.....worry is a no-no).   As a caregiver it's my responsibility to make sure Marty has everything he needs and that he is safe.   No falling, that he eats right, that he takes his medications correctly, that he checks his sugar, and much more.....  

Stepping back and thinking about that.  It's no wonder I have trouble with Peace.   But God is our peace.   I am learning that I can fall in the arms of Jesus and He can be my perfect peace.    

I continue to pray that I can do that and not dwell on the "ifs" and "what ifs".     What happens and how I take care of Marty is truly in God's hands.   I MUST lean on Him and know that I can have that perfect peace and not worry. All of our needs will be met and Marty will be taken care of.