And Go...................

The life of a caregiver……. a place I never imagined I would be.   I have just been feeling the need to share some struggles (and some good things as well).  I’m going to start with what my day is like.  These are the things I do on a daily basis.  It’s hard to comprehend unless you’re the one going through it.

Sometimes I’m not even sure I comprehend it all.  Well….here it is… what my days are like….. AND GO!

Alarm goes off at 5:30

Hit snooze a couple times.  (I would probably have more time in the morning if I skipped this step, but after you see the rest of my day, you’ll understand my desire for just a little….more….sleep…..even ever-so-briefly). 

Get up and let the dogs out.

Go to the bathroom myself.

Let the dogs back in.

Go out and let the outside dogs out of the cage.

Go in and make sure Marty’s knee walker is close enough for him to reach.

Go to kitchen and turn on coffee water.

Follow Marty to bathroom, help him transfer to regular walker and move to get on toilet.

Take knee walker back to the bedroom and gather Marty’s belongings to go beside his chair for the day.

Go back to kitchen and turn the coffee water on low.

Back to the bedroom and gather all the items for Marty’s leg and shoe for the other foot (this sometimes takes two trips).

Go back to the bathroom, get a washcloth hot and wet for Marty to wash his face.

Take the wrap off his stump.  Get the washcloth hot and rinsed again and wash his leg/stump.

Now…I usually have to put medicine and a bandage on a place on his stump and sometimes the other leg.  That happens now.

Next, I have to wash the rubber sleeve that goes on his stump.  Have to wash that with hot soapy water and then dry.  About once a week or so the process of sanitizing it gets added to the mix.

Slide the sleeve on his stump …. (it has to be just right or I have to keep taking it off and re-adjusting).

I now have to put three cloth sleeves over the rubber sleeve to fill in the space between the rubber and the prosthetic.

Before the prosthetic leg goes on, on go the shorts/pants.  Much easier to do before the prosthetic.

Now, I put his leg on him and he can get up and walk into the living room and his chair on his own.

Once he’s up, he puts in his contacts before heading to the living room.

Time for coffee and breakfast.  Usually instant coffee, bacon or some kind of meat and eggs or English muffin.  Something fairly easy like that.  Not usually a complicated breadfast, but must get it done before I can get ready for work.

While Marty is eating, I get his pills in a cup for him to take, then draw his shots.

Time for a sock and shoe on his good leg and must get him a t-shirt.

I throw some food in the dog’s bowl and give them some water.  (at least I try to remember this step….poor pooches on the days I forget!)

Now….. I can get ready for work.  Whew……

All of this from 5:45ish to 7:15.  Hard to believe all this can be done in this short amount of time.  Some mornings are much easier than others.  Many mornings are just bad for Marty.  He has trouble breathing or is nauseated.  We just never do know until we get up.  It’s always a surprise. 

Now…..this is the hardest part for me.  Leaving to go to work.  It breaks my heart each and every morning.  I hate leaving him to have to take care of himself.  I should be able to be here to take care of him.  It has gotten a little better over time, but it is still so hard. 

I work until 5:00 and get home about 5:45 to 6:00.  Takes about 40 to 45 minutes to get home…on a good day.

I get home and try to work on dishes and laundry and get dinner started.  Isn’t always a quick and easy process.  Some evenings I’d just like to go straight to bed!!  (now with three grandkids there are always evenings when there are sporting events and those get added to the mix!)

After dinner sometimes we watch T.V.   I almost feel guilty sitting down when there is so much to do.  The house usually looks a little bit like a train wreck. 

The process for bedtime is kind of like mornings only in reverse.

Get pills and shots ready.  Sometimes he’ll just take his pills with water…sometimes if having tummy trouble he needs to take them with something like chocolate milk.  That takes a bit more time.

Get his toothbrush and spit cup so he doesn’t have to get up.

Help him take his contacts out and put glasses on.

Gather up all of Marty’s things and take them all into the bedroom (sometimes two trips).

Fix his glass of ice water for bed.

Have to fill the ice trays (he’s a little obsessed with ice!!!  Lol)

Somewhere in this mix I get myself ready for bed….contacts out, teeth brushed, jammies, etc.

Must put the outside dogs into their cage for the night.

Time to feed the cats as well (They definitely will not let me forget that!!!)

Then we make the trek into bed.

Help him into bed and take his shorts, shoe, sock and leg off.

If I remembered to grab it, I put a sock-type wrap on Marty’s stump to keep it from swelling.  On nights I forget to grab it in the chaos, now’s the time I go back in and get it to put on.

About every other night I have to check the CPAP machine and be sure it has distilled water in it.

Turn on the air conditioner, fan and O2 machine.

Hmmmmm……I think I can get in bed now.

Understand this is what should happen the majority of days….ALL of this is subject to change….daily.   There are always things that are added on certain days. 

Needless to say I never expected to be a caregiver.  I wouldn’t want anyone else to do it, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t tired….a lot.

I’m writing this more for myself than anyone.  I’m hoping it will be therapeutic.  We’ll see……